For the good: it was a beautiful day in Seattle. I met up with a friend and got to meet his new pug Oscar. So cute! Then after that I met up with another friend and we explored a neighborhood I rarely visit, looking a cute shops, walking down the street, enjoying the weather, and ending with coffee and treats at Starbucks. It was a nice ending to my chemo day, which brings me to the bad:
Chemo days are by their nature bad. Pushing good ol' fashion poison through the veins is just never a good time. I got up early (too early for me) to go to chemo. Everything went fine--my counts looks good, I got my dose, etc. I have one more dose (next Thursday for this round). Then I'll have another scan to see if the chemo is working. I hate getting scans and the anxiety of waiting to hear the results. When I see my oncologist next week I'll ask about the possible outcomes and what we will do with each.
Then I went to cancer support group. I've been going to this group for 2 weeks now, and I don't think that it's for me. I committed to 3 weeks, so I'll go again next week, but I don't know if I'll continue. I'm just not sure it is for me.
And for the ugly: It's 3:30 am and I can't sleep. Thank you very much chemo and the pre-treatment steroids. I'm alone--an even bigger thank you to CF! I'm exhausted and all I want to do is sleep. I've tried. I took my sleeping pill. I did my sleep meditation. I waited. Nothing.
Right now I have the urge to deep clean my carpets, but I'm not sure that my downstairs neighbors would welcome that. I can't be sure that they can hear me (I rarely hear anything from my upstairs neighbors), but I don't want to risk it. So, I'm stuck with more quiet activities like blogging and shopping online.
1 comment:
I hope you ended up deep cleaning your carpets! Let the neighbors complain and you can apologize later! Quiet dark nights are horrible. I hope that you can create a better balanced routine for your sleepless nights. What about working on your books? Maybe if you plan to do that, you will end up sleeping instead...you will have plans set when you can't sleep and the anxiety of falling asleep may subside a bit.
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